Family Guy – Bird is the word
Christmas 2010 Number 1 ??
Yea why not 🙂
http://www.facebook.com/pages/BIRD-is-the-WORD-for-UK-Christmas-number-1-2010
Mr Otto Olympics
It’s time to dust off an old favourite of mine.
Far Side – Cow
Windows
Bus Jokes
Passenger: Does this bus go to Manchester?
Driver: No.
Passenger: But it says Manchester on the front.
Driver: There’s an advertisement for baked beans on the side, but we don’t sell them!!!
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Passenger: This bus was very slow!
Driver: Oh, I expect we’ll pick up speed now you’re getting off!!!
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Passenger:Does this bus stop at the river?
Driver: If it doesn’t there’ll be a very big splash.
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Q: What is a bus ?
A: A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it
as when you are in it.
Daft label instructions
On a well known make of hairdryer: “Do not use while sleeping.”
On a bag of dorito’s: “you could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside”
On a bar of soap: “Directions: use like regular soap”
On some frozen dinners: “serving suggestion: defrost”
On a tiramisu dessert (printed on the bottom) “do not turn upside down”
On a Marks and Sparks Bread pudding: “product will be hot after heating”
On Childrens cough medicine: “do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication”
On a sleeping aid: “Warning: may cause drowsiness”
On a box of Christmas lights:” For indoor or outdoor use only”
On a Japanese food processor: “not to be used for the other use”
On Salted peanuts: “warning: contains nuts”
On an American airlines packet of nuts: “instructions: open packet, eat nuts”
On a childs superman costume: “wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly”
On a Swedish chainsaw: “do not attempt to stop the chain with your hands”